Mariah Carey sits down and laughs, “I could use a couple of days off.” We're not surprised. The huge workload with a multi-platinum album like The Emancipation of Mimi has meant a frighteningly hectic schedule for this 35-year-old in the last six months. No wonder she's exhausted. “I love what I do, but it's like being an athlete: If you sprain your ankle, you're out for the season so I have to be careful. I have to sleep a lot of hours and look after my voice.” She adds with a giggle: “I'm happy.”
It had seemed that after the hard times following the termination of her record-breaking music contract with EMI in 2002, Mariah's career might have trouble recovering. But her talent and professionalism have taken her right to the top, resulting in three Grammy awards on February 8. “I feel that every day I'm here on this earth, I'm going to learn something,” she gives as the reason for her renaissance. “You can't let the hurt turn to hate and bitterness.”
Mariah has found a fresh confidence, largely due to the undying loyalty of her fans, who are some of the most passionate in music. “My fans are devoted,” says Mariah. “People probably think I'm exaggerating, but I mean it. I guess that's why I wanted to become famous: a desire to make music and to get out of what was a difficult childhood. I think it also came from not feeling pretty.”
There was a time when she didn't feel pretty? “It's difficult when you're ethnically mixed as a person,” she explains. “My father is black and part Spanish, and my mother is white. Not everybody can relate to that. When I was a little kid, moving around 13 times with my mother, we didn't have much money.”
Mariah says her mom, Patricia, a one-time opera singer, has been crucial in her success and in her understanding of the word that is often used to describe Mariah: diva. “That's how I learned the word diva when most people probably didn't know what it meant. I know the real word ‘diva.’ The true diva. My mom worked very hard to support us after she got divorced. She could have gone further in her career as an opera singer, but she encountered a lot of racism because of her marriage.”
Mariah was married to former Sony Music chairman Tommy Mottola for five years, ending in divorce in 1998. Speaking of her own love life, Mariah's answers are not free-flowing. What does she find romantic? “Music is very romantic. Also roses. I like to give flowers too. But some men don't get it when you give them flowers.” What quality would her perfect man have? “A sense of humor is really important to me.” Why doesn't she talk about the men in her life? “I feel like if there are things that can remain private — keep 'em.” Are rumors that she has no love life true? “Well, people can think that.”
She then opens up about her failed marriage. “I feel like I got married before I was ready because I was pressured,” she says. “I felt if I did that then, he would stop thinking that I was trying to go or have an affair — that is so not me. Some of my friends just want to shock me with their stories of sexcapades. They laugh at me because they know I'm a prude.” When we've seen her perform so sexily on stage in eye-popping costumes, it's hard to think of Mariah Carey as a prude, but she insists that she is. “Yeah, because of childhood traumatic stuff. Like seeing things and not wanting to have a baby. I never wanted to feel violated, and I know that's kind of a weird thing to say, but that's how I am.” But what about those naughty stage outfits? “It's a dichotomy. That's like dressing up and playing Barbie: It's all for show. In reality, I'm very protective of myself. I feel that I should have known better but I was young and naive. I'm healed now, but there will always be defensiveness in me when I think someone is trying to be too controlling.”
Talk turns to vacations, and Mariah bursts into smiles and admits she spends most of her money on secluded getaways to foreign locales. “When you're out in public and you're a celebrity, you're working,” she says. “You're at dinner, and there's a little kid who comes up to you and asks for an autograph. Are you going to say no? You'd think their parents would tell them: ‘Not now. She's eating.’ But they don't. It's part of the gig. If you don't want to deal with people, then don't go out that night. On vacation, I go to an island that no one will be on and get a yacht. I really, really love going for a vacation in the warm weather with beautiful, blue water.”
Mariah's essential travel items are her Jack Russell dog, Jack, and comfy cushions. “I take my comforter and my pillow because they remind me of home,” she giggles. “Even if it's a private plane, the pillows they have are so big, and mine are so cushy and soft.”
She's also pretty picky about her microphone, a trait she describes as “bizarrely healthy.” She adds, “I have to be overly aware of people holding the microphones. We singers know that if someone touches your microphone, you have to sterilize it. Some opera singers won't even leave their house unless they cover their face because it's their instrument.”
If Mariah couldn't sing, you get the feeling she wouldn't know what to do with herself. Even if she retired tomorrow (don't worry, it's not going to happen), she admits, “I'd still sing for fun. That's what I love.”